Am I...?

Yesterday and today, I felt a little nausea. Am I pregnant? I don't really know yet. Perhaps it was just some "bad" food consumed lately that made me feel queasy inside?

Just two days ago, someone advised me not to be hasty in deciding to have a second child. "Emily" said I should wait till Joseph is a bigger boy, maybe about four or five years old. If I have a second one too soon, I may find my hands full and end up feeling frustrated instead.

Actually, I'm prepared for the increased "workload". I prefer having my children's age gap closer, i.e. two or three years apart. Then I can be in the full swing of things, night feeds, diaper changing, bringing up two young children all at one go. I really don't fancy going back to "square one" after I have attained some level of freedom in four or five years' time.

Also, having closer age gaps would facilitate the sharing of common topics between the children. From school work, to juvenile crushes, to teenage angst. Hey, you don't tell your mother everything, do you?

Anyway, I've observed that there are generally two schools of thought. The first advocates having children one at a time, meaning you plan to have the second one when the first child (having achieved a certain independence and ability to appreciate a younger sibling) is at age four or five.

The second group, to which I belong, prefers to just go with the flow. Let's have them now, and be done with it (oops..! sounded a little unrefined back there... my apologies!). Furthermore, William and I only planned to have two children, not a whole soccer team worth of them.

So you see, there is no "right" or "wrong" stance about this whole thing, it all just boils down to Personal Preference and Individual Circumstances.

Anyway, nothing prepared me for motherhood that first time, till today I'm still discovering new things. Ditto for the second time, there may be some unchartered land for me to run aground. Putting God into the picture would help stave off most of my anxieties, if not all.

My dear Lord Jesus, thank You that You were always there for us, and will continue to be so. You are faithful, our faithful Lord!